Expectations

It's so funny how expectations can change. I guess they haven't really changed for girls - ever since Medieval times, we've expected that boys court us, treat us like princesses, give us the world, and want to forever. And I'm not saying that they don't want to do all of those things, but I think sometimes our expectations are too much. I mean, I just watched Eclipse...twice. And what girl wouldn't love to have two very good looking guys vying for her affections? What girl wouldn't love to have someone so devoted to you (completely) that they would risk their life for you repeatedly?

But boys don't always have the chance to prove those things. A lot of times, love is just...normal. And nothing crazy happens where boys need to prove how strong their love is. I think that's probably why girls find the proposal so important - it's the one time the boy has the opportunity to prove his undying love to the girl. It's the one time that he's at his most vulnerable - literally on his knees for her. It makes a girl feel special, feel loved, feel safe.

I was listening to the radio this morning, and there's a survey that says that 80% of women were disappointed with the way their husbands proposed. Really? 80%? I couldn't believe it. If the one that proposed to them was their love for life, does it really matter how he proposed? But girls have it in their heads that it has to be a huge spectacle. He has to jump through 100 hoops and make a huge deal and buy a huge diamond. But honestly, none of that matters if you get to marry the one you love. Why would it? It's not about any of that.

I think, sometimes, we don't give guys enough credit. I also think it's partly the guy's fault, because he doesn't show his feelings nearly enough. :) But ladies, we are often really hard on guys for that. And it's definitely not their natural state, so it's hard for them to remember.

I think that's why I like The Notebook so much. That book and movie, among other things, is an amazing love story about just two people. Just two people that fell in love young, and had to overcome incredible circumstances. And yes, Noah is incredibly romantic and crazy at times, but mostly, he's just a guy.

So I'm going to try harder to not put too much expectation on my husband. Because I should know he loves me more than anything else. And although he doesn't always say it, I know it. I just need to remember. :)

Love you babe. :)

Dreams

Dreams are so funny sometimes. You grow up thinking you know exactly what you want to do and who you want to be - you're so sure. I was SO sure at age five that I was going to be an author. I wrote an essay about it (with surprisingly (or not so surprisingly?) few grammatical errors). I took as many English classes as I could in high school, and majored in English in college.

Yet here I am, working in investment advising as my full time career. But is it really a career? Is it just a job I have until something in "my field" comes along? I'm not even sure English is "my field." Just because I have a degree in it?

I'm realizing now something that nagged me in college - I'm not sure if English is right for me. Yes, I will always love English and reading and writing and even poetry, but is it what I should be doing? This is what this blog is about - trading my dreams for God's. He has a plan so much better for me than I could ever think up myself, and I have to learn to trust that.

But it's difficult when you think you are going down one road for your entire life, then you realize 24 years in that maybe it's not the right path. You feel a little lost, a little out of sorts.

Maybe that's why I'm holding on to other dreams I have a little harder. I really want to travel to Europe. I want to see and experience and smell and breathe it all in. I want to make a difference in people's lives. I'm not sure whose yet, but someone's.

I'm in a state of . . . I'm not sure the word. Confusion? Maybe. I feel like I'm losing part of myself, but I'm not yet sure what should replace it. It's a little terrifying. Okay, it's a lot terrifying. I still live in the town I essentially grew up in. I never had crazy or amazing adventures. Questions come up like should I go back to school? For what? How do I make my life have purpose when I feel so without direction?

I can tell God has me in the process of maturing so much, and it's nice to see progress. I failed my Registered Paraplanner test last Friday (continuing education for work; I needed a 70% and got a 69%). Usually, I would have totally beaten myself up over not being good enough and not working hard enough and disappointing so many people. But instead, I had a little cry about it, said a prayer, and moved on. God has taught me so much about life and lessons, and it was nice to see those teachings in action in my life. At the same time, this maturing process isn't easy and it definitely isn't quick. It's something I need to get used to, I think, because God needs to grow me and who I am before I can become who He's made me to be. And I think He can't reveal who I should be until I finish learning these lessons He's teaching me.

It's a long, slow, painful process. But I'm doing my best to have the patience and learn from my amazing God all He is teaching me. Because I know He has something amazing in store for me; I just don't know what yet. And I'm trying to remember that's okay. I don't need to, because I have God. :)

Inspired

So I have a little story that really inspired me, so I thought I would share. :)

I know someone who recently found out their son has cancer. This poor little boy, who is six years old, is enduring weeks of hospital stays, he can't walk, and it's in general, not very fun. I can't even imagine how it is for the parents.

We went to the 11:00 service at church last Sunday, since it was our last day of our class at 9:30. Well they brought their son, fresh from Ann Arbor, to church. Not only did they make time to come to church, his mom wrote on Facebook that they finally get to go to church and how God is good. The pastor had us all pray for the little boy, then we did a different activity where we went up on the altar and added to a drawing. Well on the way up, they took up the little boy, in his wheelchair, to contribute to the drawing.

Sometimes it's unfathomable the amounts of faith people have. Honestly. I know that God will not put you in a situation that you can't solve, but I'm pretty sure I could not handle that. It's amazing to see someone else's faith in action like that. It brings a little smile knowing that even in those circumstances, God is moving.

Feel free to pray for this little boy. I haven't met him, but he seems incredible. :)

Wedding Weekends

So the next few weeks are going to be really busy for us!

It all starts tomorrow, when I need to be in Peck, MI (the thumb) at 10:30 am to help Rachel set up the hall. One of my greatest friends from college (Rachel) is getting married, and I get to share in her day! Way excited. So tomorrow will be all wedding, and so will Saturday (obviously). I know it's going to be an amazing time and I am so happy for her - she deserves it!

Anyway, we get back Sunday, then Sunday night is the Survivor finale (I know, I'm a dork), Monday is a full day of work, then Greg and I leave for Washington DC on Tuesday! I can't believe it's already here, but I am SO looking forward to it. It's going to be so much fun. The next Saturday (the 22nd) my cousin is getting married in DC, plus I get to see all of my family, so I know we're going to have a blast. =)

Like I said...it's going to be crazy. But I've really been thinking about some things, and sometimes I regret not studying abroad, or moving somewhere crazy, or doing something nuts with my life. But at the same time, I feel like I'm exactly where God wants me to be. And I wouldn't change my trip to the Dominican for anything - it was wonderful. So as much as I have an itch to do something drastic, I know that God wants me here. So I will definitely obey. This is what this blog is all about - trading my dreams for His. Because His are the only ones that matter. :)

See you in a few weeks!!

Home Improvements

I can't believe sometimes how hard Greg works on our house. He told me when we were living in the apartment that he really wanted a house so he could have things to do - well he definitely has it with this house!

We've repainted the laundry room a nice sunny yellow, and Greg is restaining the cabinets so they are actually nice looking instead of antiques. It's really coming along nicely. Now he is outside working on our new deck/front porch. We haven't had one for quite a while because they had to tear ours out to replace the sewer line. But it's looking fantastic so far!

That's basically what we've been doing the last few weeks besides working. It's been crazy, but fun. Now we have our wedding season coming up - Rachel's wedding is NEXT SATURDAY! I'm very excited to be in her wedding (and that my dress fits!). Then right when we get back we leave for our DC vacation. I am so excited for that - I've never been to DC and it should be a blast with my whole family going!

I think tonight I may plan out our DC trip. I love planning things like that and it should be an amazing time. I thought of all of the SVSU grads today - I can't believe it's been a year since I walked across that stage. So much has happened!! But a good year it's been - I can't wait to see what God has in store for us next. He is such an amazing God, and we are SO blessed!

:)

Tattoo

Okay the post didn't work....let's try this. :)

Update on me

So Ashley reminded me that I haven't written in a while, and I have a few minutes so I thought I should. :)

Things are going okay for me. I don't know if I wrote this, but Greg and I had our sewer line replaced in our front yard. Thus, our front yard is completely torn up. It's been a while since we had it done, so I'm getting a little sick of our neighbors gawking at our yard. ;) Anyway, we had Troy Schmidt of Schmidt Builders come out today and will give us an estimate on a new front porch (ours was torn out in the process). Depending on prices, we're hoping to have both the front porch done and then the landscaping (and taking out one of our trees) very soon so our front yard is normal again.

On the inside of the house, we are about to be able to prime and paint the laundry room. Then we need to buy a countertop and backsplash, then stain the cabinets, and the room should be back in order. After that we need to complete the flooring in the basement. Once ALL that is completed, our house will be back to the way it was when we bought it. I know, right? Then we can start prioritizing the projects that we actually WANT to do. =P

Work has been crazy busy lately. Of course, since I work for a CPA firm, tax season hit pretty hard. But in my line of business, we're super busy right now with quarter end. I should have stayed late today but had Troy coming out for an estimate so I left on time. Just a lot of projects right away - feast or famine, right?

I am excited about the new class that Greg and I are taking at Messiah. It's called "Ordinary Day with Jesus" and is definitely something I struggle with in my Christian walk. In the first class we talked about when the day exactly starts, and according to the Bible, it starts in the evening. So basically, when we wake up, we are just joining God in His work instead of "starting" the day. I thought that was really profound and has really helped me so far this week. I think next week is everyday relationships, so I'm excited.

I'm also really looking forward to May. I have Rachel's wedding, in which I am a bridesmaid, then a vacation with Greg to DC for my cousin's wedding. It should be a lot of fun and definitely needed. I will be full time for a year starting April 24th, so I then get two weeks' paid vacation, which will be super nice!! Hopefully Greg and I will be able to take a few weekend trips or something this summer.

I also got a tattoo. I absolutely love it and don't regret it for a second, but I don't think I'll get another one. I'm content with this one. Let's see if I can figure out how to post a picture in this post...

Hmm...I think that's all that's going on with me. O:) Quilting this week, which I'm excited for - I don't think I've done any since the last quilting day. Oh I take that back, I made a pillow. :)

I hope I start updating this more often. On the plus side, I had a lot to talk about!! Now I'm off to study some more for Paraplanner (continuing ed for work). I hope I can learn it all before the test in June!

*Love covers a multitude of sins* - 1 Peter 4:8